INTRODUCTION
The English Dictionary defines marriage as “the legal relationship between a husband and wife; the state of being married, the ceremony in which two people become husband and wife”. On the other hand, the Bible defines marriage as a man leaving his father mother and be joined to his wife (Gen. 2:24). Christian marriage is a union between two believers who have agreed to live together in the biblical principles binding them in marriage. That is, they are willing to contract their marriage in accordance with social-legal manner. Someone has rightly said that “marriage is a total commitment and a total sharing of the total person with another person until death” (Wayn Mark).
Marriage is for life, and not everlasting. God who is the inventor of marriage instituted it for His glory, and He wants Christian marriages to be patterned after the union of Christ and the Church. Therefore, marriage is God’s unique gift for intimate companionship; and it is a channel of lawful sexual expression according to biblical standards. Consequently, biblical teachings affirm sexuality as a part of our embodied existence. Human beings are sexual creatures, and as sexual creatures, we are enjoined to honor God with our bodies. However, sex is not the only reason for marriage, rather, it is a unique component that sustains a happy married life. Against this background this essay will discuss some biblical facts about sexual relationship including strategies for keeping sexual sparks alive and as a means of keeping one’s family God’s way.
Sex as a gift and responsibility
The Bible places sex and sexual activity within the larger context of holiness and faithfulness. In this regard, the Bible presents an honest and often detailed explanation of God’s design for sex and its place in human life and happiness.
First, the Bible affirms the goodness of sexuality as God’s gift. The Song of Solomon is an extended love poem with explicit erotic imagery and language. Sex is affirmed as a source of pleasure and shared intimacy between husband and wife.
Second, the gift of sexual activity is consistently located only within the context of the marital covenant. The husband and wife were naked but they are not ashamed (Gen. 2: 25) because they have become one flesh (Gen. 2:24). Sexual relations are limited to this covenant relationship. All forms of extramarital sexual activity are condemned including premarital sex (fornication). The husband and wife are ordered to fulfill their marital duties to each other and not to refrain from sexual union (1 Cor. 7:2-5).
Third, the Bible consistently links procreation with the marital act (Ps. 128:3). Children are products of sexual act. It is a mystery.
Fourth, the Bible addresses human sexuality in all honesty. Paul, in his epistle to the Corinthians acknowledged the reality of sexual passions among married couples (1 Cor. 7:9) and admonished those who have not been given the gift of celibacy to marry rather than to allow their passions to turn into sinful lust.
The reality of sexual brokenness is also addressed. The pain and shame of adultery, for example, are demonstrated in the account of David’s sexual sin with Bathsheba. In 1 Corinthians chapter five Paul rebukes the church for tolerating sexual acts of immorality among the members.
God’s original intention is for sexual acts to occur exclusively with the unique monogamous relationship of marriage as a reminder that they are one flesh bound together by covenant.
Facts about Sexual Relationship in Marriage
God created both the man and woman and commanded that they go and multiply, and replenish the earth. They were created to form family relationships, through sexual intimacy. Non, consider the following facts about sexuality facts about sexual relationship in marriage:
- Sexual intimacy is reserved for the marriage relationship and is approved and blessed by God only in that state. Both the man and the woman become one flesh according to God’s command. The physical and emotional pleasures resulting from a faithful sexual relationship in marriage is overwhelming and pleasing to God.
- Godly sex is only permitted within the four walls of marriage. Therefore, one of the things that build love in a marriage is a sexual relationship.
- Sex is a divine invention designed to be experienced and enjoyed exclusively within the boundaries of marital union.
- Dr D.K. Olukoya, in one of his lectures on marriage relationship made clear the right conceptions about godly sex. According to him sex is not only natural but also spiritual, and must be handled with care. The body of the woman belongs to the husband and vice-versa. Both the husband and the wife have the right to initiate and enjoy godly sex any day except periods of fasting, sickness, weakness, menstruation, as the case may apply.
- Sex is one of the strong pillars that holds a marriage and it must occur exclusively within the unique monogamous relationship of marriage as a reminder that they are “one flesh” bound together by divine covenant.
- Above all, sexual intercourse is part of the natural expression of love within a marriage, for it provides emotional intimacy, deepens the couple’s friendship, and helps to develop oneness within a marriage (Gen. 2:24; Prov. 5:15-19; 1 Cor. 7:2-5).
